Radio Flyer

Last night's cine de noche was "Radio Flyer," a coming of age kind of fantasy with the dark cloak of domestic abuse starring as the fictional obstacle to an otherwise blissful mid-sixties tale. Car buffs no doubt regaled in the various models used to authenticate the street scenes. Engineers were certain to revel in the imagery of two young boys designing a flying machine from only their imaginations. What left me with an irksome nausea were the scenes of abuse, or rather, the suggestions of the abuse. My wife of six years spent twenty-some-odd years with an emotional terrorist. She and my step-daughter, who is now twenty-five, carry emotional scars and talk little of those years. From what I have been able to find out about the darkness, it is a wonder either of them can function at all. The step-daughter has blocked it out of her memory--a new lovely tale of familial concert now plays in her head.

It is mysterious thing, a woman's spirit. Some seem drawn to the very person who will destroy them. I stand chained and gagged as I watch the tragedy unfold, unable to help; wanting to kill the predator. But they go back again, and again. I want to scream at them but know I would only become more of the cacophany that rages in their head. "Stop this!" "Get away from him!" They will not listen. I do not know why. So I conjure up scenes of rational beings.

"You know he is going to kill you some day?"

"Uh huh. I 'spose."

"Why in God's name don't you get away, move to a new town?"

"He would find me."

"Get a TRO, befriend the police."

"That would just make him madder."

"Jesus! Would you listen to yourself? You have surrendered to this asshole!"

"Please don't yell at me."

"Sorry." "You do not have to live like this..."

"Yeah, I know.  I gotta go. If I'm not there when he gets home, he gets angry."

"Baby, you don't have to stay there. You know that, right?"

"You're sweet."

Two days later, she was found dead in a dumpster.  LISTEN TO ME:

He is NOT sorry that he hit you, just afraid of consequences for his savagery. He will NOT change--your love has no effect on his poisoned soul! He does NOT love you, never will.  He is simply incapable of it.

Memorize this:  "The first time he hits me or threatens me, I swear by Almighty God that I will get away from him by whatever means possible. I will not hesitate to pick up my things or explain myself. I will disappear from his life immediately and forever.  So help me God."